Ok....Important Safety Tips!

• Always choose costumes that are bright and reflective. Make sure that shoes fit well and that costumes are short enough to prevent tripping, entanglement or contact with flame.

Got it...

• Think twice before using simulated knives, guns or swords. If such props must be used, be certain they do not appear authentic and are soft and flexible to prevent injury.

Hmmm don't like this one

• Teach children their home phone number and to how call 9-1-1 (or their local emergency number) if they have an emergency or become lost. Remind them that 9-1-1 can be dialed free from any phone.

Very Important, got it...

• Don't run with scissors

Ok, I get that one too...

• Don't try to take stairs two at a time going down a concrete and metal stairway at night when the power is likely to go out leaving you in total darkness and descending into a pit of inky blackness with god only knows what at the bottom as you accelerate at10 meters per second squared.

Sigh... would that this was something I can say "Let's not and say we did". I consider it a dress rehearsal for my audition as a crash test dummy. Entertaining as all this sounds, it is sadly not nearly so entertaining to experience. On the good side...nothing broken beyond my pride... on the down side... Stairway 1, Tim 0.

Right now... Vicodin is my friend




***Flashback Shot***

In my youth I went on a calm rampage against a certain type of cactus, after I kneeled on it and it left me some pointy reminders embedded in my knee. Many a cactus knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you! Or was it blasted by a shotgun? Either way I was able to exact my revenge against the offending cactus and its brethren that day. I think I will insult the stairwell prodigiously and call it a day.